Two years ago, I participated in the ten days of reflection that precede Yom Kippur (My Jewish Experiment Day 1). I did not participate last year, but want to take these days to reflect now.
So, here goes:
Describe a significant experience that has happened in the past year. How did it affect you? Are you grateful? Relieved? Resentful? Inspired?
My divorce became final this year. Even though we have lived completely separate lives for over two years, and have had almost no contact since the day that I moved out, actually getting divorced and getting my maiden name back felt liberating. Especially getting my maiden name back. Until your name has unpleasant connotations, you don’t realize how often you hear it or say it on a normal basis. Picking up a prescription at the pharmacy? Give your last name. Going to the bank? “Welcome, Mrs. Elder.” Signing a credit card slip. Signing his last name.
When you are trying to leave a marriage behind, his name keeps popping up on your way to the new you.
Until I got that final divorce decree. Which changes absolutely nothing about how I have been living during the last two years, or my finances, or anything. Except that now I can get my precious name back. And I am grateful.